God+Was+Bored,+Kevin+G+Lee



 God Was Bored by Kevin G Lee

Once upon a time, God got bored. And to end his boredom, he started rummaging through his box of stuff. Then he found some paint. Now God wasn't a painter but hey, he was God. He started painting a circle on his canvas. Then he painted it all green. But when he was getting his hot-pockets out of his microwave, he tripped over his internet cable (he did not yet have wireless) and accidentally kicked a bucket of blue paint onto his drawing. Looking carefully, God saw that it filled up approximately 75% of his circle. He thought that the circle looked pretty cool that way so he left it like that. Then he started to draw people and animals. He was going to paint them all white but after looking at his paint supply, he saw that he would run out of paint if he did that. So God started painting people and animals different colors. God took three steps back to look at his lush green utopia. It looked so great, he decided to name it after himself. And thus, planet God was born.

As he started to move the drawing into his art portfolio, God tripped on the same internet cable from before and his painting fell into a mix of tarter sauce and mustard. (He hates ketchup) The tarter sauce smeared the very top and bottom of his planet and there were blotches of mustard in various places. Using his almighty powers, he attempted to get rid of the stains. Oddly enough though, the tarter sauce froze and the mustard dried up and turned into grains of sand. God was not happy. He immediatly called his cable provider and demanded that he gets upgraded to wireless. His cable provider demanded an extra 10 dollars a month, but because he was the almighty, God haggled it down to 5 dollars. God was so happy that he could log onto facebook from anywhere in his house, he quickly forgot about the drawing. But one day, he saw the drawing under his couch. He decided to rename it Earth, and threw it into his folder (The Universe) along with all his other sketches. God then turned on the tv, watched some baseball, and fell asleep.